Showing posts with label jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label jokes. Show all posts

See what the mother of the transgender teen who killed herself wrote on Facebook

See what the mother of the transgender teen who killed herself wrote on Facebook

17 year old Leelah (Josh) Alcorn committed suicide on Sunday December 28th by walking in front of a tractor trailer and left a suicide note before he died. But when her mum reacted to her death on Facebook, she wrote something that many folks in the gay/transgender world are very upset about. First the mother said she was 16 when Leelah wrote she was 17. Carla called her Joshua instead of the name she'd given herself, Leelah and she also refused to acknowledge that Leelah had committed suicide instead she wrote that she was hit by a trailer. Meaning that she still doesn't accept who Leelah was as a person even after she committed suicide. After the backlash, Carla deleted the post and removed herself from Facebook. Leelah Alcorn blamed his suicide on his Christian parents...


Leelah's parents

Nollywood Director Mac Collins Chidebe Blasts Genevieve Nnaji

Popular movie director Mac Collins Chidebe has blasted actress Genevieve Nnaji for insulting Nollywood, the industry that gave her the fame and the food she is eating today. Read what the man has to say: 
"Genevieve has just insulted the industry that made her who she is today and what effort has she made to help improve Nollywood? Those days in Enugu when Genevieve was growing in Nollywood, our movies were not rubbish; she has grown now, made money, fame, popularity e.t.c, how much has she invested in this Industry that made her? 
"All the while she was busy waiting for Titanic scripts, Nollywood was trying their best to keep the flag flying waiting for her to come back and take the industry to the next level. Artistes should stop biting the fingers that fed them. We are watching and waiting for them to bring down heaven. We made them stars; we are waiting for them to come back and take the industry to the next level. Instead of blasting Nollywood, come and improve Nollywood."

Genevieve had accused Nollywood of producing mediocre movies after the same movies made her popular in many ways and even richer than she had imagined. Below is what Genevieve said about Nollywood...
“I guess I haven’t found the right script yet. Creativity and depth are the qualities that I look out for in a script. In the beginning, the movie industry emphasised quantity but things are changing and there is an improvement in trend. I am among the people who advocate for the improvement of the industry. So said, I am constantly watching out for the kind of stories I take part in. I am in support of movies that show a great deal of professionalism and creativity.  
"Having practiced my art in international & professionally produced stories like ‘Ije’; ‘Mirror boy;’ and ‘Tango with me’, I don’t think I can return to the blandness and mediocrity that characterized Nollywood in the past.”

Update On Boko Haram Businessman Who Kidnapped The Girls

There are strong indications that the fake businessman who was arrested recently as a kingpin in the network of Boko Haram agents that kidnap the over 200 Chibok girls in Borno State has a lot of security information.

Consequently, the security agencies have moved the Boko Haram kingpin, Babuji Ya’ari, to a secure location in Abuja. He was moved to Abuja early this week from his Maiduguri base, where he was arrested.
A security source said, “I can tell you that the suspect has been moved to Abuja. He was brought to Abuja early this week. He is being interrogated in connection with the abduction of the girls. 
“What is important to the Federal Government now is how to secure the release of the girls. He has made useful information that will assist security agencies.”

The source, who disclosed this to Punch, said Ya’ari was being interrogated in connection with the abduction of the Chibok girls. He said that security agencies were trying to get from him, information that could assist in the release of the girls, who had been in Boko Haram custody for more than 70 days.

According to the source, the General Officer Commanding 7th Division, Nigerian Army, Brig Gen MY Ibrahim, was also at the Defence Headquarters for a strategic security meeting, which might not be unconnected with the arrest of Ya’ari and the ongoing investigation into the abduction of the Chibok girls.

The suspect, said to be a business man, was reported to be under intense interrogation, and he is expected to provide vital information on how the abduction was carried out, and give a clue on the location of the girls in the deadly Sambisa Forest and other hideouts where the girls were being kept.

Director of Defence Information, Maj. Gen. Chris Olukolade, had in a statement on Monday identified Ya’ari as a leader of a youth vigilance group, popularly known as the Civilian JTF. He had said that Ya’ari used his membership of the Civilian JTF to gather information to aid the activities of the insurgents.

Olukolade said Ya’ari also spearheaded the murder of the Emir of Gwoza, Idrissa Timta, who was killed by the insurgents at Tesan Alade, along the Biu-Garkida Road on May 30, 2014.

Pastor Arrested For Allegedly Killing His Friend For Rituals

If not that the man's wife called him earlier and he told her he was in Pastor's house, no one would know:
Nigerian Police operatives attached to Ogun State Police Command have arrested a popular pastor in the state identified as Pastor Abimbola Alonge, for allegedly killing his friend, Yusuf Kamilu, for rituals.
Mr Kamilu’s wife, Adijat, said after her husband was found at a junction lying half-dead the following morning, the pastor lied to them on phone that he travelled. Read what she said below:
“At about 10am when he left the house on Tuesday, Pastor Alonge called him on phone, and my husband replied that he was already about leaving. He promised to come back at about 6pm because I was not feeling alright too, and I was even using drugs.
“By 3pm that same day, I called him on phone again asking whether my ATM card was with him because I needed to withdraw some money. He still answered me cracking a joke, and I heard the voices of about four persons laughing in the background. He said it was my ATM card that he was eating now in pastor’s house. That was the joke, but it made me to know that he was still at that place [Pastor's house]."

Police building collapses in Lagos


A 2-storey building which served at the toilet, bathroom and kitchen extension of a residential house inside the Pedro Police Barracks, Somolu Lagos on Monday June 30th collapsed around 8pm. Fortunately there was no casualty. 
The building, said to be in a very weak and dilapidated state caved in when most of the residents were reported to have been in their living rooms.
Yesterday July 1st, officials of the National Emergency Management Agency, NEMA, were at the scene of the incident to evacuate the occupants of the building while police officers from the Pedro police station, cordoned off the area. (Pic credit: Punch)

MTN to launch Music + App


Africa's most valuable brand and leading ICT Company, MTN Nigeria is set to redefine and revolutionize the entertainment industry in Nigeria with the launch of its Music+ App.
The company has perfected plans for the launch expected to hold in July and they intend to pull out all the stops on this one.
The exclusive event promises to be full of fun and excitement. There would be dropping of new hits and singles from some of the company’s Music Ambassadors. Also, one of the MTN music ambassadors would do a collabo with renowned international star, Diana King of the Shy Guy fame.
A-list artists, top DJ’s in the industry and top media entertainment independent programmes producers like Sound City, Hip TV and MTV Base as well as Beat FM will all be in attendance. The event is strictly by invitation!

Music superstars dazzle Lagos fans at MTN Project Fame concert

Brilliant! Exceptional! Incredible! Those were the words fun seekers used to describe the Project Fame All Star Concert that took place at the LTV Blue Roof Arena, in Lagos, over the weekend. In what will go down as one of the most exhilarating and exciting concert witnessed in recent times, fans came out en masse to party with their favourite superstars and MTN ambassadors. Continue..



Timaya posted one of his best performances so far; Chidinma Ekile dazzled the audience, Banky. W rocked, Oritse Femi tickled, Praiz elated; The Mavins made their presence felt, Kcee mesmerised and Olawale Ojo, winner of Project Fame 6, thrilled his fans. The crowd stood up for great showmanship and applauded the extraordinary giftedness of the artistes that graced the All-Stars stage.
Every moment was electrifying. All the artistes were exceptional. Choruses like ‘Surelere’, ‘Ukwu’, ‘When I Become Rich and Famous’, ‘Is Nothing’, ‘Kedike’ and a lot more reverberated down the winding Agidingbi lane and echoed across the serene centre of excellence.
There was a moment of ingenuity when Larry Annetts, the out-going Chief Marketing Officer of MTN, enlivened the audience by his perfect rendition of Kcee’s ‘Limpopo’. The marketing chief soon became the focal point as the spot-light picked him up and showed he was actually singing not miming the song. Many said if the marketing guru could learn and understand not just the tune of the song but its lyrics, then he must represent a brand that is passionate about its customers.
There was sheer brilliance in other performances. For instance Seriki’s lyrics were alluring. He held the audience spell- bound with his tight rhymes and street vibes. He generated instant love, especially among the teeming young people who reechoed every line of his Yoruba rap.
The climax of all the performances was the moment Timaya rendered his ‘Ukwu’ song and invited a lady who many felt the title perfectly addressed.
Speaking to some of the participants, they unanimously expressed their satisfaction with every performance at the show.
One Salami Odumosu said ‘it was one of my best nights’. Another participant called Ken, a student, quipped, ‘because this is the first time I’m seeing Timaya perform, it is actually fun’.
There were lots of positive comments, commendations and testimonies from participants. This is a good omen for the season 7 of the MTN Project Fame musical reality show, which starts on July 19, 2014.

See photos below...

SEE President Jonathan Eating With His Muslim Brothers

The Ramadan fasting fever is in the air and President Goodluck Jonathan has caught the bug. He may not be part of the fast but joined top Muslims in his government to break the fast inside the Aso Rock. More pix...


With the president are Vice President Namadi Sambo, Peoples’ Democratic Party chairman, Adamu Mu’azu, Inspector General of Police (IGP), Mohammed Abubakar and other top government functionaries.

Keshi never resigned

Keshi © Action Images


Stephen Keshi has astonishingly declared that he has not resigned as Nigeria coach.
Reports in the past two days quoted the former Nigeria captain saying he was no longer coach of the Super Eagles, but Keshi says that is not the case.
The “Big Boss” claims he was misquoted.
““What I said to my players was that this may be my last match at the helm of affairs in the national team, because my contract terminates with the World Cup and I have not been offered a new one.
“I was a bit shocked that the global media went to town to say I have called it quits with the national team. Resignations are not done on the pages of newspapers but formally,” he said.
Keshi, who took over the reins of the Nigeria national team in 2011, led the side to glory at the 2013 Africa Cup of Nations.
He then resigned barely 24 hours after his finest hour as a coach before rescinding that decision shortly afterwards.
The Nigeria Football Federation has yet to officially react to the latest situation.

I Don't Miss My Mainland Agberos & Alomo

 I am an Ajebutter. Not by birth, or by formings, or by swag – I am simply an unapologetic Ajebutter by default. I didn’t choose to be born one. God, without seeking my opinion (because He’s God, I guess), gave me the genes of an Ajebutter and a funny Bri-Merican accent . By luck or some twisted work of fate, fortune, Karma (I might have killed ten defenseless puppies in my past life) or destiny, I have found myself in Lagos, crazy Lasgidi, and this is my story…
 Joey Akan, Joey’s Chronicles Of A Lagos Ajebutter, Pulse.ng

Yes O! I don port o...
Finally I decided to move from the Lagos mainland to the Island, and Jesus, I'm loving it. Having spent over a year in Surulere, and dealing with a number of interesting occurrences and lifestyles, I wish never to return....ever!
To be honest, (before you all begin to think of all the fancy residential spots in your head,), I didn't move to Victoria Island, Lekki Phase 1, or where the old money resides, Ikoyi. Nah, they're way too expensive for me...for now. I moved to a less fancy spot with plenty of water, and a high number of Niger Republicans.
I moved to Ajah! The glorious suburb of Lagos.
I have spent 2 weeks here, battling with my new environs, dealing with the tush neighbours, and getting used to the idea that I never will have to leave home without dipping my fine shoes in some little puddle, or try to dribble my way out of a number of small ponds.
And in 2 weeks, I have discovered the true meaning of life. You see, this life ain't all about the grind, and daily hustle that characterize living on the mainland. It's a bit more than that. A little chill, a little more relaxation, and boom! Life becomes clearer.
For example, I now know how much a bag of cement is worth. On the mainland, I was too busy fighting off Agberos to even remotely consider building my house. But now the world appears free from trouble and pidgin english, so now I must build that house. Gbam!
And also, one other really interesting feature I love about living in Ajah, are the ladies. Of course! The women here are mostly tush. They have a sense of esteem and belonging, and always swing their hips slowly to seducing effect. Yes, I have been looking, and that's only because they wear very strong colognes to always make me notice them. Other than that, I'm a good Christian brother, born, baptized, and bred in the Presbyterian Church of Nigeria. Amen.
But before I go, let me at least spare some kind words to the Lagos mainland. My sweet Lagos Mainland.
'Dear Land Of Agberos,
How are you? I hope you haven't exploded from all that population, hustle, and Agberos?
Well, after one year of scary but interesting romance, I have decided to break up with you. Not because you are bad, or haven't been nice to me, but because all the Agberos in the world originate from you, and I can't speak my English with a confused accent without being threatened by some envious illiterate. Also, Alomo and Agbo aren't my favorite drinks, neither do I love to smoke weed and SK.
But you do love those things, and no matter how much I try to live with it, I have discovered that I can't. It make s life hell for me. Even all your Danfo conductors aren't helping. The other day, one ran away with my N900 balance, the other one stole N40,000 from a passenger, and jumped into the sea. Although he was later caught sha.
Not to say you were really that bad. All the late night roadside noodles and eggs couldn't have been possible without you. Also, I can speak some Yoruba now, and also know the taste of Amala and Ewedu. Thanks. I will look back with fondness on all the good times we shared.
Your Runaway Boyfriend,
Jonathan Joey Akan

Police Nabs Kidnapper And Ritual Killer Pastor

The Lagos Police Command should be commended for the prompt arrest of the kidnapper and ritualist pastor, Ernest Nwankwo who has been on the run since his nefarious activities were discovered.
 Pastor Ernest Nwankwo is finally shackled
The long arm of the law has finally caught up with the kidnapper cum ritual killer pastor and General Overseer of Holy Family Ministry, a.k.a House of Mercy, located in Ogolonto area of Ikorodu, Lagos, Pastor Ernest Nwankwo.
The 50 years old Anambra State born Nwankwo who was fingered in the kidnap of a boy by one Mrs. Rosemary Chukwu, as the brain behind the crime, has been on the run but was nabbed in the Ebute-Metta area of Lagos, after a tip-off to the police.
The people of the area was in shock with the discovery that the so called pastor who had lived and operated in their environment for a long time was actually involved in illegal activities.
When his den was busted, some people who have been kidnapped as far back as 2012, were discovered and rescued.
The Lagos State Police Public Relations Officer, Ngozi Braide confirmed the arrest:
Yes, the Pastor has been arrested today around Ebutte Meta.

Boobs Exposing Saga: Cossy Fights Dirty With Ebube Nwagbo

When Cossy posted her raunchy pix on the social media to celebrate the Super Eagles last week, one lady who was not happy with her display is fellow actress Ebube Nwagbo. So, immediately the Eagles lost their match in the group of 16 stage, she was quick to blast Cossy and others who expose their body. She said:
But Cossy is not a lady who takes such attack lightly. She went all out to expose Ebube...

Chai! these babes just love fighting themselves, it's part of their way of life. Lol!

Nicki Minaj Almost Died of Weed Overdose & She was Ashamed to Even Call for Help

Busty singer Nicki Minaj was inside a room where they were taking Indian Hemp in excess and at a stage she got chocked and almost died. But guess what? She could not call for help because of shame. Hear her:
"The other day, literally I didn't tell anybody this, I really thought I was about to die. Like, I was saying my prayers to die. And I didn't even want to call the ambulance because I thought, 'Well if I call the ambulance, it's going to be on TMZ'. 
"I would rather sit there and die. And it made me realize I don't care what anybody got to say. I'm going to do me."
Nicki made the shocking revelation during her acceptance speech for Best Female Rapper at BET Awards on Sunday to the surprise of many, as she stated that she was ashamed to call an ambulance because she didn't want people to read about her on TMZ, a popular US gossip website. What a lame excuse!

Funny enough, the same TMZ already got the info and they say she almost died due to 'weed overdose'. lol!

Uduaghan Settles Kefee’s Hospital Bill, Body To Arrive Nigeria Soon

Uduaghan Settles Kefee’s Hospital Bill, Body To Arrive Nigeria Soon
late kefee and hubby. A few days ago, the Nigerian community in Las Vegas, United States issued a statement appealing for the release of the body of the late singer Kefee, who died on June 13,2014 from lung failure after 15 days in a coma at Desert Spring Hospital, Las Vegas. A statement signed by its president, Festus Ebonka read, “We appeal to Nigerians to help take her remains back
Stella Dimoko Korkus’ Gossip..It Only Happens Here!

Acid victim Naomi Oni releases new pics and reveals she's started dating again

Tuesday, July 1, 2014

Prominent Northern politician and former minister, Umaru Dikko, dies

Prominent Northern politician and one time Minister of Transport during the second republic, Umaru Dikko has died at the age of 78. His son, Bello Dikko confirmed his death.

Dikko was said to have died in the early hours of today July 1st at a London hospital where he has been undergoing treatment for an undisclosed illness. Family sources say he'd suffered three strokes  in a row. Mr Dikko was a minister during the Shagari Government (from 1979-1983). May his soul rest in peace Amen.

I'm sure by now you all know who Naomi Oni is. She was attacked with acid in December 2012 by her own friend who was jealous of her. The friend, Mary Konye, has since been imprisoned.

Ms Oni released these beautiful new photos and revealed that she has started dating again. Speaking with UK Close magazine, the 23 year old, who was single for a while following the incident after her boyfriend dumped her two months after the attack, said she recently had a boyfriend, and although it has since ended, the relationship really boosted her confidence.
"He said I was gorgeous and completely took me by surprise - he approached me in the street and said he'd read about my story and thought I was so inspirational that he wanted to take me out.
'Things didn’t work out with the guy I was seeing and we’re just friends, but it’s boosted my self-esteem. 'I'm enjoying being single at the moment but I'm ready to fall in love again with the right person. 'Naomi said. All the best to her!!

Prominent Northern politician and former minister, Umaru Dikko, dies

Prominent Northern politician and one time Minister of Transport during the second republic, Umaru Dikko has died at the age of 78. His son, Bello Dikko confirmed his death.

Dikko was said to have died in the early hours of today July 1st at a London hospital where he has been undergoing treatment for an undisclosed illness. Family sources say he'd suffered three strokes  in a row. Mr Dikko was a minister during the Shagari Government (from 1979-1983). May his soul rest in peace Amen.

My Woman Wants To Kill Me In The Bedroom

I decided to bring out this issue because I've already promised this lady marriage last year and I'm trying to get all the money that is required for our wedding. But she has been growing too fat since this year and the worst thing is that she now seems to love séx even more than me, the man. I can't even say 'NO' as her weight is heavy and she will just hold me down anyhow she likes and I will have no choice but to satisfy her.

We already live together and as it is now every night I must do something...

My productivity in the office is dropping and one of my friend told me last week that am reducing. I believe him as I can feel it inside that this woman is becoming too big for me and this is making me to think too much.

I wish I can leave her and run away. Why can't she just reduce her weight? I can't even tell her. *am sad*